Psychedelics & Lessons on Deeper Sex II

Before you read this second installation, please read my first blog post on psychedelics and tantra! If you like to break the rules, read on anyway 😉

Drugs and sex have probably gone together since the dawn of time and when you add a spiritual component… well now you have a party.

I’m a big fan of psychedelics as aids for tantric sex and I also classify weed as a psychedelic because it is very psychoactive. Both shrooms and weed have allowed me to expand the range of sensations I can feel.

I’ve used these plants to help me shift my perspective. Under their influence, I experience my body differently and that helps me map my pleasure in unique ways.

Under ideal circumstances, I’ve found that both plants have accelerated my ability to relax and feel uninhibited. On my last shrooms experience, I got in touch with a profoundly sexual part of myself that I often deny. With every stroke, I felt led into the heart of that sexual energy. It felt good not to feel shame or guilt for indulging in it. I felt free.

The guilt I usually feel is related to my Christian upbringing and puritanical sexual education.

In addition to becoming uninhibited, plant medicines help me be more imaginative with how I experience pleasure. Primarily this is because they have a body load. Body load can be thought of as a sensation of being pulled down into the earth. Those sensations make me feel like I’m in my body more. It’s a heaviness in my body that makes every touch feel different and awe-inducing.

As a chronic overthinker, who is often trapped in their head, I find that helpful. Thoughts occupy most of my experience to the extent that I can hurt myself without feeling it until hours later. My mind takes up most of my energy and uses everything available to it to generate thoughts.

The unique tactile sensations while under the influence of these drugs override my thoughts. I topple out of the clouds and land back into my body, back into the present moment.

Body load also helps me feel the pleasure pathways throughout my whole body.

Exercise To Do While On Psychedelics

Pleasure pathways are like currents of energy that pleasure can travel along in the body. This is my own made-up term but it describes my experience pretty well. I’ve also read that meridians are energy highways and that’s what I’m referring to here.

On shrooms I can feel how pressure applied on my foot can be felt in my groin. I think of that path from my foot to my groin as a pathway. On shrooms thoughts like that don’t seem odd at all. It’s easier to lean into that premise and see where it goes.

As you can see below, regions of the feet match up to places on the body. If you’d like to learn more research Traditional Chinese Medicine or click on the image caption.

Finding all those pleasure pathways becomes a fun time of exploration. I usually do this with a partner whom I trust. My altered state opens me up to sensations that would be so subtle otherwise. I experiment with having my partner touch me and note the differences in my body. I feel out the path the energy takes.

If you’re thinking of doing the same, you probably won’t feel the energy at first. What you’ll feel is sensation and how it travels to other parts of your body. I highly suggest playing around with your feet if you aren’t too ticklish. Otherwise, pick another sensitive spot like your neck, behind your knees etc.

As these sensations make their way through your body, tune into the feelings. Try to expand those tingles and lean into the sensations. Pair this with thinking about how much you love or enjoy your partner.

Flood yourself with feelings of arousal for them and see if those feelings can erupt into sexual energy that travels along those paths of sensation. All of this sounds abstract, and it is. Your imagination is key in discovering how to open yourself up to feeling more.

It’s a process. In my experience, it’s much easier when you’re relaxed and uninhibited. In my previous blog post, I mention the prerequisites for this kind of exploration.

The energy can expand and travel to your chakras. If you take a look at the diagram of the feet, regions of the feet correspond to other areas of the body and both correspond to specific chakras. I’ve included both the chakra diagram and feet diagram below so you can look at them together. Take a look at the adrenal gland and how that’s associated with the orange sacral chakra. On the feet diagram you can see that the adrenal glands are stimulated by the inner part of the foot. If you have you partner massage the inner foot that should send sensations to your sacral chakra.

By using the feet to ignite these energy pathways to your chakras with the added boost of psychedelics, you can start to feel more tantric energy.

Integration Process After Taking Psychedelics

After I’ve explored under the influence and come back to my regular state (sober), and integrate my experience. I try to remember how the energy felt. What path did it take through my body? Can I add that path to my pleasure map?

The next time I have sex with my partner, or they do something like what we did on shrooms, I try to feel those sensations again. I don’t try too hard. In fact, maybe trying is the wrong word. I relax into those sensations again without expectation, just curiosity. I’ve noticed that the more relaxed and non-judgmental I am during this integration process, the more likely I am to feel those sensations again.

I think that this process works by igniting a path that energy can take throughout your body. The shrooms/weed tune you into those sensations and show your mind that those paths are there. When your sober, your mind knows that those paths exist and gets used to the idea that the energy just has to be awakened.

Research is starting to show that shrooms help certain areas of your brain that never talk to each other, communicate. The plasticity of our minds can’t be underestimated.

This is why it’s important to work on your imagination in a sexual setting. Our bodies can feel so much through the mind-body connection. The process of having more tantric sex hinges on the use of your imagination to open your energy. It is a type of meditation.

I’ve had so many kinds of orgasms; I’ve lost track of what they all feel like. There’s so much more to sex than our culture is aware of. If you choose to learn more about tantric sex, I’m so excited for you!

I’ve seen colors while cumming (happened sober). I’ve left my body and come back to it in such a satisfying way (happened sober too). I’m very insatiable so none of that is ever enough, but it’s comforting to know that there’s always more I could sexually be exploring. The universe continues to top my last experience and I honestly have no idea how. This energy exists within and without us. It’s something we can naturally tap into at any time, but it’s like we’ve forgotten how.

If you choose to use psychedelics on this journey, please be careful and understand that these tools aren’t something to take lightly. Shrooms and weed are amazing accelerators, but they aren’t necessary to enjoy tantric sex.

Both have traditionally been seen as ceremonial drugs because of the states they can put us in. I’m trying to repair my own relationship with both of them by gaining a sense of reverence for them. In the past, I’ve been overly reliant on them to escape, but now I understand that moderation has the most benefits. I also try to use them with an intention in mind.

You can add either plant ritualistically to your sexual experiences, but I would caution against becoming reliant on either of them to get you into a tantric state of being.

You’d be fine practicing my tips for tantric sex without either plant (see my previous blog through this link).

I’d like to list off the specific things that get me into a tantric energetic space. Keep in mind that on the sensitivity spectrum, I rank very high so my experience could be different from others.

If you aren’t a person who is very sensitive, you can work on it. In the past, parts of my body had shut down to sensation because of trauma, but resolving it gradually helped a lot of my sensations come back.

For someone who doesn’t think they have a lot of traumas and views themselves as less sensitive, I would ask yourself how often are you truly in the present moment? Can you slow yourself down enough to revel in all the sounds, smells, and tactile sensations around you? You might need to practice connecting to your body. Remember you can only connect to your body in a safe environment.

That’s how you’ll increase your sensitivity to the present moment by relaxing into being there. The only way to feel safe in the present moment is if your environment and your partner are supportive.

Like I said in my last blog post, tantra is a way of life and holistic practice. There are conditions that need to be met to reach that level of vulnerability and intimacy. After all, you are quite literally tapping into the Universal life force by connecting with another human being. Love needs to exist between you and your partner.

1.) Sounds in my ear: I adore auditory sensations.

I was surprised that I don’t feel anything listening to ASMR on YouTube. That was one of the most confusing things to me because I’ve always loved when a lover whispered in my ear. It was Season 1 of White Lotus when Olivia was making ASMR sounds in Paula’s ear, which shed some light on what I needed. I needed the IRL human component.

My partner makes sounds in my ear, and he’ll match the breathless moans that I’m making. Sometimes he’s egging me on and whispering, “you like that don’t you.” When I get really worked up, he’ll mimic my raspy cries. The sounds, his breath, and his words all work together to give me goosebumps. The sound tends to travel down to my sacral chakra (right bellow the belly button), expanding until I start thrusting. Most times it’s followed by an energetic orgasm (an explosion within the sacral region).

2.) Eye gazing: this can be very uncomfortable at first and it takes some getting used to.

So much intensity can be conveyed through the eyes. When I stare into my partner’s eyes it’s like energy is shooting right back at me. Intense love tends to get converted into energy and travels down to my sacral chakra. Most activities ignite energy in that location for me because that’s where creativity and sexual energy is housed.

3.) Blow jobs: I have intense orgasms giving my partner a blow job!

Some people don’t enjoy giving blow jobs, and I totally get it. Your jaw can get tired and sometimes you’re with a partner that doesn’t allow you to go at the pace you’d like. This is why there’s a stark difference between just giving someone a blow job and enjoying it.

My partner lets me go at my own pace. I usually focus on how much I love him and how much pleasure I want him to feel. I slowly start to work more and more of his cock into my mouth, until he’s comfortably hitting the back of my throat. The second I think about his cock being in my mouth feeling like it does in my pussy, it’s like a connection is formed. The sensations transfer to my pussy like he’s simultaneously in my mouth and vagina.

I tend to feel the energy in my throat chakra and sacral and sometimes root chakra. My partner gently places his hand on my throat and that activates my throat chakra even more. A shot of energy goes all the way down and back up through my mouth. I usually dislodge his cock breathlessly and collapse on the bed to ride out the rest of my orgasmic waves.

4.) Being called a good girl: IDK why but I crave hearing that so much.

I could probably point to always feeling like a bad girl because of growing up Christian and puritanical views, but I think I just like the dynamic.

My partner sounds dominant and in charge when he tells me, “be a good girl and cum again for me.” I want to please and that part of me is so deeply ingrained. It’s nice that I get to explore that in a safe context where I’m not people-pleasing in a toxic setting. I’m a good girl, a very good girl and because I’m treated right, my partners get to know how good I can be. This lights my whole body up with sexual energy.

5.) Observing when my mind is wandering out of the bedroom.

Noticing this, helps me figure out why it’s wandering. Is it the angle/ position we’re in? Am I stressed? Do I want to have sex or am I craving intimacy instead? (I’ve been known to stop having sex if I’m not feeling it)

Most of the time the issue is just my mind being hyperactive. I bring myself back to the present moment by asking my partner to verbally walk me through an orgasm. He’ll start by saying, “Imagine your orgasm building up inside you. I want you to let it build up to a point that you can’t hold it in anymore and then beg me to cum.” His voice helps me visualize what my body is doing and that usually brings me back to the sensations and the present moment. It’s like his words make my body do what it needs to to cum.

He also brings me back by whispering in my ear. Touching one of my chakras. Asking me questions that I have to answer. He’ll also wear a fragrance I like and dab some on his wrists and that’ll snap me back into my body when I smell it.

Bringing my mind back to the present is the hardest practice to master. It’s also why I can’t share how I meditate with other people in everyday conversations.

6.) Slowing down: so underrated!

Sometimes I ask my partner to stop and just hold his cock inside of me. Then I ask him to slowly start thrusting. I think this works because it stops the sensory overload and gets my body to refocus on the sensations in my pussy. Starting slow is fantastic too! This works best when I’m on top of him (I’m there a lot).

7.) Chakra tracing: the ultimate, advanced-level finishing move.

My partner and I are very connected energetically after practicing tantric sex so much. It doesn’t take more than tracing circles on my skin in the areas of the chakras to illicit earth-shattering orgasms. Another thing I’ve observed is that it works even better if he uses one hand on my back and the other on my front side. It’s even better if he does it a couple of centimeters above my skin, kind of hovering above the chakras.

My root chakra is also felt an inch or two below my pussy. Using his fingers, he’ll swirl the air (weird but hey it makes me cum). I found an image supporting what I’ve felt so I’m getting reassured that I’m not crazy. Take a look below.

8.) Foot massages: feet are very sensitive!

I love foot fetishist because they know how to get me going. My partner isn’t that into it so most of my experience with this comes from other partners I’ve had. As I said the feet have a lot of pathways to other areas in the body. Kissing my feet sends sensations straight to my pussy.

9.) Breath syncing: amazing but expert level.

This is the hardest one for me to master and it only ever happens in the moment when I’m not thinking. It’s easiest to do when I’m kissing my partner and I catch his breath. Something about his scent and his breath entering my mouth is so hot and he’ll do the work of following my inhale with an exhale and doing it again and again until I, you guessed it, cum.

Breathwork is amazing but not my favorite because of how my mind gets in the way. I tend to overthink syncing my breath with my partner’s.

10.) My safe word when I feel overwhelmed.

Pleasure is wonderful but at these levels, it hurts sometimes. I need a way to ask for it to stop. I don’t think that I could ever feel so much to the point of breaking myself. Like I’m not going to stop being able to tap into tantric energy because of overwhelm, but it’s still important to observe the natural limitations of my body.

I hope this list sheds some light on what can be done to get into a tantric space. Keep in mind that a lot of these things exemplify the concept of the circuit that I talked about in my last blog post.

One person does something and it’s reciprocated by the other, creating a charge. You can do this through things like breath or power dynamics but someone’s got to expel the energy and the other one has to receive it and then vice versa. That feedback loop creates the necessary energy. The masculine and feminine, the dominance and submission, yin and yang, and duality all elude to this universal law of energy exchange.